SONNET II

We met on Helvellyn, a wet June day,

Drowning under a wild sky; blistered feet

And feelings running high. Which was the way

To Patterdale you asked? I said with heat,

What superb feat of navigation brought

You halfway down Helvellyn, the wrong side?

Love really started there, your rude retort,

A real Geordie snort, cast my wrath aside.

You wanted wedding bells; they were a must

Meeting your parents, calling up the clan!

Love foundered quickly, as did wanton lust,

Falling from the heights, where it all began.

I loved you then, as I would love you now

But then, so young, thought love not worth a vow.

SONNET III

Remember that far springtime of first love

When you were the badge of my adult state

That sweet dream, that made me throw down the glove

And gain laurels, acquiring life’s rebate

Of love fulfilled and passion so unbound.

A Prometheus’ fire, but victory

As false, a God’s revenge. So sad the sound

Of weeping when the parting came to be.

I displayed your favour, wore out my sword

Jousting with pride upon the field of lust

All to no avail, it took just one word

To burn to ashes, fall to futile dust

That dream of love eternal, youth’s vain pride,

That fresh kernel, that just as quickly died.

SONNET IV

Paris ‘en vacance’, bored at Café Flore.

A handsome woman, could she be a tart?.

A smile, a fond glance, a chance to explore

A sagging bed at Nine, Rue Bonaparte!

‘Gauloise, garlic, vin ordinaire’ and sweat

Her dominant, sexual energy

On top of me, the memory lingers yet.

Then, back to Café Flore, reality

Once more. A sad and rueful Englishman

Admits he’s met his match. Enough’s enough

Of quickfix sex, his smarting loins outran;

The object of a Grande Dame’s ‘bit of rough’!

Man can never plumb her depths. Womankind,

Always the mistress, robs him of his mind!

SONNET V

Sunny Aix-en-Provence, in the springtime

Of my youth. The apple loft, whose sweet hay,

Perfumed the sexual truth, while fields of thyme

And lavender wafted our guilt away.

An honoured guest, your husband’s ‘Grande Ami’

Yet I , ‘jeune allie Anglais, a la bas

Tout Allemagnes, jusqu’a eternite’,

Made love to his beautiful wife, to pass

The time of day. Such pleasures of the flesh

Are short and dearly bought, in shame, the way

Of infamy Such memories will enmesh

My sad scarred soul, ‘till resurrection day!

I’ll guard gold and honour, even your life,

'Mais, je vous prie, Ami,’ you guard your wife!

SONNET VI

You were almost blind, spectacles astray,

My table shook, wine stained my book and real

Romance, at last, by chance had come my way.

Or so it seemed but fate had schemed to steal

My dreams away. A fellow traveller I,

Ours not to reason why. McCarthy’s boast,

Your Embassy post, caused our love to die.

Three months of bliss from that first kiss, a ghost

Of Left Bank love. There was no further chance

For true romance, at that demented time,

Repatriation, from that ‘Commie France’,

Was your punishment. But what was our crime?

Love, life and liberty was all we sought,

But one man’s vain quest, brought it all to nought.

SONNET VII

My landlord listened for my creaking bed,

But office colleagues never even knew;.

‘Young Mr Francis with that married red

Haired typist? Hah! Pull the other one, do! ’

Remember the Abbey gardens, blue sky,

Those sunny lunch-time breaks, your knickers in

My pocket, your brassiere lifted high,

Skirt around your hips, as I entered sin.

So we laughed, we sinned, but your husband had

An inkling, was wise to our shame and taught

Me a lesson that it was no game. Sad,

This young lad who, cheating at love, was caught!

The bible warns, adultery leads to Hell!

Black eyes, bloody nose, do it twice as well!

SONNET VIII

I never plumbed your innocence, for you

Were twenty-one, playing so worldly wise.

Loves old refrain offered no restraint, to

A wild affair, hot passion’s fire, the prize,

Pure molten lust! God help me, had you said

That you were convent bred, I would have torn

My manhood off than carry you to bed!

A virgin’s fears, the blood and tears, forlorn

Regrets indeed. But who can really say

What harm ensued, what guilt imbrued my mind

Until this day. I only know the way

It was. You screamed, leaving my soul behind.

I never knew! The old excuse, that lie!

Yet still nightmares’ echo, that torn-out cry.

SONNET IX

You, the Am-Dram female lead, I, the spear-

Carrying extra, the so silent slave,

And supplier of music, lived in fear

Of rejection. I sought the smile you gave

When all went well, kidding myself that smile

Was meant just for me. Was this the same man

Who’d strutted, cock-like, along that smart mile,

The Rue de Rivoli? An ‘also ran’?.

I look back on it now, wondering how

We made the church, past love’s early madness

And spent those happy years together, now

Seen to be a path leading to sadness.

We, so certain when we marry in haste,

So sad to survey the resulting waste.

SONNET X

You were my temptation in the desert!

I, low in spirit, marriage in free fall

Desperate for love and ready to flirt

At that sales meeting in Bradenham Hall

Across the reception room, your eyes fired

Signals, the chemistry was there to feel

And down in the depths I knew I desired

Someone to drop a rope, some sort of deal

In quickfix sex, to fill an aching void.

Lord, it seemed so right; those nights pure relief.

To hell with those vows that, like celluloid

Shirt strips, become a conventional fief.

So, as many have done before, I fell,

Consigning marriage to ten years of hell.

SONNET XI

My wife on Valium, took to her bed,

Your spouse sifted ‘undies’, looking for sin.

But our love was too urgent, when all said

And done, too cruel the world we both loved in

That mere consideration passed us by

In the carefree way such lovers employ.

It could not last, indeed we did not try

To justify the sour truth, just enjoy

Wallowing in our sin, turning to dust

The love of those who knew that phrase

For its true worth, hoping that their trust

Would lead us from our self-destructive maze

Adultery, a weak man’s dirty deal,

Once over, never lets his conscience heal!

SONNET XII

Endings are always so final, the door

That once opened up in joy, in closing

Becomes a symbol of so many poor

Excuses, sordid betrayals; posing

Loves’ false endearments to ‘ad nauseam’.

Your fault was to forgive my random lust

For all women, mine, not to give a damn

For conventional attitudes, but just,

In arrogance, assume it right for men

To spread their wanton wings and have no heed

Of vows. Such sorrow, carelessly sown, then

Reaps the sower, bitter harvest indeed.

If you should read this now, please understand,

In dreams, in love, we still walk hand in hand.

SONNET XIII

We kissed in Whitby Abbey, then we snogged

In Robin Hood’s Bay and in Scarboro’ Town,

Caution thrown, we went all the way! Unclogged

By false conventions but our very own

We took love by fours, for we were not sane

Those days on Cleveland’s moors! The air, so keen

Threw bonnets to the wind, those rules arcane

Proved no bar, to behaviour quite obscene!

Four days of lusty living, then too late

Our ‘Brief Encounter’ over, our sweet tour

Down to ‘fate’. You, back to your married state

Me, back to some ‘sad cypress’ time once more

That time of love forever will remain,

And its echo will join Earth’s own refrain

SONNET XIV

If love’s a jungle, we the predators,

How did we end up in bed together?

No prey, just two hungry alligators

Tearing chunks out of each other’s leather?

Or had we, by accident, fooled each other?

I knew you’d had half the Director’s Board

And the Front Reception too. Another

Rumour hinted you were at one accord

With Fred, the dreaded parking ‘lord’. And me?

I biblically knew my boss’s PA.

The colour of the Lift-girl’s lingerie,

As well as two girls in the typing bay!

Our roads crossed just that once, never again.

Why on Earth did we protest love, in vain?

SONNET XV

I never thought that you would come, aware

Of your family’s concern. Elgar’s chords

Unleashed my soul, suddenly you were there.

Almost Edwardian, there were no words

Our hands touched, frisson passed and the shy kiss,

Intended for cheek, found your lips instead .

Love was born, concert palling, an abyss

Yawned, free falling, we found ourselves in bed!

Your wedding, society affair! I

Was invited to greet the marriage pair.

Your groom, stockbroker, gave me a hard eye

But your sweet smile, made no one else aware.

An arranged marriage, leaves a bride no room

For true love, unless, she pre-empt the groom!